The show must go on....

It's been a while since i have blogged any thoughts to you all...and that is solely because i have sooooooo much on my mind that i don't even know where to begin! My life is a bit of a roller coaster these days. I'm 28 years old and i am about to start round two of the fabulous life of Kasia. It ain't over til the fat lady sings ya'll, haha.
Did you ever think you had it all planned out? Well i did, until a curve ball came my way January 1st 2010. People change, so just when you think you know someone and trust someone.... be very careful. Two and a half years ago i never would have imagined i would be sitting here blogging, with a For Sale sign in my front yard, in an almost empty beautiful single family house. i was sure this would be where i would start a family. I could have given you names of children that i imagined would sleep in the two smaller rooms next to the master bedroom. I have a deck so big that it can hold two patio sets and two grills and still have room for a chase i can lay on to get a tan on those hot summer days. I have a walk in closet and a bathroom that connects right to my room (if you have ever lived in a small Chicago apartment, you know this is a big deal, lol). My oak staircase that i decorate in lights and garland at Christmas time is what i have always dreamed i would have one day in a home. Yep...my house made me happy very happy actually.... but relationship did not. My marriage fell apart after two and a half years. Things like this aren't planned or expected. How quickly things change is still unbelievable to me. i am learning a lot while i go through this divorce. Learning about myself and about the person i though i was going to have a life with here in this home. I am growing stronger everyday from all of this chaos. Because as the saying goes...WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU ONLY MAKES YOU STRONGER. I have no room for fear in my life right now. For fear is only a sign of weakness. I am not weak nor will i let anyone make me think that i am anymore. As i start to empty out of my life all negative people, i will only leave room for the positive and optimistic ones. I have realized that this house is not my home, and therefore i am ready to say goodbye. I have not gone this far in life just to have someone think that i will now fail. this just gives me the ammunition to succeed even more. I now have higher goals then i ever had. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy and that's the road I'm headed for. I don't care if i end up in a one bedroom basement apartment for a while when this house sells..because at least i know i am doing it on my own. I will survive this and end up on top no matter what!! I have the best support system anyone can ask for. I have my health and i have the strength from God to keep going. This is so far one of the hardest things i have ever had to go through.....But it's just a bump in my road of life ( well more like a mountain really, lol) My mother always taught me to be independent..and i have her to thank for my success thus far. She s my angel and she doesn't even realize it.
If you have ever thought that you had it all figured out and then things didn't go your way, or plans got destroyed... don't be discouraged. Just think of it as another opportunity. Another chance to show what you are made of. Some people don't get second chances in life and some don't bother trying to make a change with the life they have.Well not me, I'm not about to give up now. I will not settle and watch my life just pass me by (cuz we all know it goes by too fast) So if you are unhappy and feel like you are worth more, then make it happen. Only you have the power to make that change happen.
I will leave you with words of encouragement because that is what i live by. Positive attitudes get positive results. Put a smile on your face and you will feel better. Give someone a compliment and you will see that you will get one back. Believe that it will be ok..and it WILL be ok!
Well, it's late and i need my beauty rest. The gym is calling my name at 6am tomorrow. So goodnight for now and always remember "The show must go on.."